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Depending on where you start your entrepreneurial journey, your life skills, your lessons learned thus far and the obstacles you face in getting up and running your lessons learned will vary. Here is a short list of some of my most valuable lessons learned and how they relate to some advice I received from Peter Kemball.

Peter provided me with one of the most memorable and important lessons I have ever learned. Basically it goes something like this; 15% of people are truly altruistic and do things for the right reasons all the time, 70% of people are normal do things for the right reason most of the time and finally 15% of the people are just out for themselves, arrogant, bullies and just generally nasty. Understanding what motivates people and which bucket they fall into; 15% good, 70% normal or 15% nasty is super important.

Some of the best advice I ever received came from very close to home, my wife. Her advice to me was being nice to everyone. This is great advice and since Ottawa is really a very small town with everyone connected by one degree of separation and usually by multiple paths being nice is important. This applies to the first two buckets or 85% of the people. Usually the people in the top 15% bucket (Altruistic) are great to have as close friends.

Being nice to people doesn’t necessarily mean that everyone is your friend, there is a difference. You need to collaborate and get along; however, certain relationships are more about business and less or even not at all about being friends. Separating business from being friends and knowing which category people fit into is really important. You need to deal with people in your life and business in the appropriate tone and tact. This has been a valuable lesson and one best summed up in a quote from Ben Franklin; “Those things that hurt, instruct”. This applies primarily to the second bucket or the 70% who could be either good friends or business associates, have a firm idea in your mind where people stand.

Finally there is the third and final bucket or that lower 15%. Keep an eye on these people, however, they will never and should never be friends and in a business situation be sure to protect yourself. If someone like this threatens your business then you should take appropriate action. Good entrepreneurs have a ruthless or shark streak in them that is kind of a survival mechanism and when threatened this characteristic kicks in. Identifying this type of person is super important and often they are great chameleons. Use proper business etiquette under normal circumstance, however, if threatened remember your first goal is the survival of your business.

Cheers,
Ian Graham

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Do you get better decisions by taking less time to think about them?

I am currently reading the book “Blink” by Malcolm Gladwell. Gladwell is certainly one of my favourite authors have learned from “The Tipping Point”, found “Blink” an amazing read so far and am looking forward to outliers. Blink is titled the power of thinking without thinking. Well worth a read if you have the time.

Now back to the original question are decisions that take less time actually better than those that require time and a due diligence process. I honestly believe there is considerable merit in those blink decisions. The computational power of the unconscious human mind is considerably more that the conscious mind. There is tremendous value in that primitive intuitive sort of thinking that you feel rather than actually think. Making decisions with the heart instead of the head can produce far better results.

A really important question to ask yourself in the decision making process is “How do I fell about this decision?” Once you are in tune with your unconscious computer great things can start to happen.

Cheers,

Ian Graham

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I meet with Jeff Eisen my life coach on a regular basis and have benefited greatly from his wisdom. We last met at TheCodeFactory about two or three weeks ago. As we talked he mentioned that your journey through life should be effortless and easy if you are on the right path. At least that is my recollection.

I have given this considerably thought and reflected on the sentiment of effortless and easy. I tend to agree with the first part if you are pursuing your passion in life then time passes effortlessly. However, I struggle with the concept of life should be easy.

Should life be easy?

Personally I don’t want things to come to easily. My preference is to work hard and earn success. Most successful people in life fondly remember the early days in their journey when they had little, worked hard and reflect back on what great times these were later in life.

When I worked for a large multi-national company I had a great salary, good co-workers, life was relatively easy and I had a whole lot to be grateful for. However, at the same time life was somehow less fulfilling than it is now when I am pursuing my passion in life. Life is a whole lot of hard work right now, yet at the same time in terms of personal fulfilment never better. I appreciate the weekends far more, value my time with family more than ever (perhaps because there is less family time), have met an incredible number of excellent people and am more determined than ever to achieve my goals. I like hard work and don’t want easy.

When life is easy I don’t think we fully appreciate all the great things we have, in fact we take them for granted. .

Cheers,

Ian Graham

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I often find inspiration in quotes. This past weekend I attended my uncle’s funeral and while traditionally a sombre occasion one that my uncle wanted to be a celebration of his life rather than a mourning of our loss. In this respect there were a couple of inspirational quotes that I wanted to share.

The first is from my uncles’ sister in law to my aunt regarding reflecting on their marriage.

“Don’t mourn because it is over, be grateful that it happened”.

The next was from one of the speakers at the ceremony reflecting on my uncles’ leadership style. This is a quote from Henry Truman that I really like.

“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.”

Cheers,
Ian Graham

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I enjoyed the movie City Slickers with Jack Palance and Billy Crystal. There are a couple of lines from the movie that I thought were classic.

The first one is where Bill Crystal and Curly are riding along together on the range. Billy Crystal jokingly turns to Curly and says “Have you killed anyone today?”

Curly answers: “The day ain’t over yet”.

The second one is another exchange between Crystal and Curly regarding the meaning of life. Crystal says to Curly something to the effect of what is the meaning of life. In return Curly slowly turns to Crystal and shows him his index finger, “it this”.  Crystal replies “what a finger?”.  Curly goes on to explain that it is up to you to decide what that “one thing” in your life is that is most important to you. He adds it’s different for everyone and you are the one who has to decide, if you can’t figure it out no one is going to be able to explain it to you.

There is some wisdom in Curly’s logic although I believe that your meaning in life is probably made up of many fingers rather than just one.

Cheers and have a great weekend,
Ian Graham

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A close personal friend of our family passed away suddenly and unexpectedly this week. Judging by how our family and friends have been shook by the experience it is difficult to imagine the pain and suffering the immediate family is going through. Reflecting on this tragic turn of events has inevitably lead to that question of “What is the meaning of life” and your own mortality. He was a great guy, a good father, actively involved in the community and friend to many.

The best guidance I can think of for how you should go about living your life comes from Stephen Covey’s first habit “Begin with the end in mind”. If you live your life by thinking about how you want to be remembered there is a good chance you will live a life that matters, at least to you, your family, friends, colleges and the community in which you live.

The principle of begin with the end in mind is built on the premise of how you want to be remembered at your funeral. There will be four speakers at your funeral; someone from your family, a friend, a college and someone from the community. What would you want each of these people to say about you as they eulogize you at your funeral. If you live your life keeping in mind how you would like to be remembered then you have set the foundation for your personal mission, vision and values.

We’ll miss you Matt.

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I just finished reading “Outswim the Sharks” on the weekend a good learning opportunity and a great read. Will start with the story on how I obtained my copy of the book. I had written a post regarding Piero Ferrucci’s book “the power of kindness” another great read. Anyway, Reut Schwartz-Hebron author of “Outswim the Sharks” had left a comment on that post (you can check it out here) and after exchanging a few emails and a phone call she was kind enough to send me a copy of her book. “Outswim the Sharks” is certainly blogmatic recommended reading.

The key concepts of the book are; Real Knowledge, Simplicity and Systemic Thinking. Wrap around all of these concepts a kind management style and you have the basis for the book “Outswim the Sharks”. I am a huge believer in kind management as the best way to create a positive results oriented culture.  My favorite quote from the book is “Unlike any other “material” the only way you can get human beings to co-operate in recruiting their desire and skills to excel is if they chose to share it with you.” What I particularly liked about “Outswim the Sharks” is that it provides a framework for implementing a kind management style. While the book focuses on large enterprise organizations and their managers there are certainly some very valuable lessons for start-ups too.

The quotes and examples used in the book are first rate, actually I think just reading the quotes was more than worth the price of admission, they are carefully chosen and highly relevant to the subsequent chapter. The quotes used in the book are truly amazing.

The greatest challenge for me was wrapping my head around two concepts; focusing on process rather than results and the idea of systemic thinking.

Reut postulates that real knowledge is more readily acquired when you focus on training and process rather than results. If you focus on process results will be the natural outcome. While I understand the concept I still struggle to internalize the lesson. My personal view is that process is an enabler of results which I believe is consistent with the premise outlined in “Outswim the Sharks”.

The second and more significant enlightenment for me comes from the chapters on systemic thinking. To paraphrase, systemic thinking is all about identifying repetitions and contradictions between functional bodies rather than focusing on the functional areas. Said another way you can identify and resolve more issues by examining the linkages rather than the objects. This is a very powerful concept and I will be rereading the systemic thinking chapters another time or two before fully grasping the concept.

All in all a very good read and I would recommend “Outswim the Sharks” to anyone considering how to implement kind management.

Cheers,
Ian Graham

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What you know or don’t know will affect how you perceive situations or opportunities.

My wife recently saw a talk show that described how Yael Naim, the lady that sings the song “New Soul” for the new Apple Macbook Air ad on TV, was discovered. The show explained that the Apple advertising team had heard the song for the Macbook Air while in Europe. The song was performed by the French artist that at the time was relatively unknown. Since the airing of the Apple ad the artists career has sky rocketed.

What I found incredibly interesting about the ad was that before I knew the artist was French I just enjoyed the song for what it was not detecting any accent. After finding out that the artist was from France and hearing the song again I thought to myself, now that you mention it I can detect a French accent.

What you know will affect how you perceive.

Cheers and have a great weekend,
Ian Graham

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I have loaned “the power of kindness” to a friend of mine so the life long learning posts for the next couple of weeks will take a different tack.

My life coach Jeff Eisen has a saying “be open to everything and attached to nothing”. This is a valuable and difficult lesson to internalize, at least for me. My take on the meaning is that you need to exercise your powers of observation more than the natural tendency to judge. The more you observe the more opportunities will present themselves. If you judge you are closing the door to possibilities rather than taking people, situations and opportunities on their own merit.

As a Myers-Briggs type identifier person with a strong “J” component this is a real challenge. Judging and assuming more often than not lead to false outcomes than possibilities. Keeping an open mind and objectively assessing the situation will result in better outcomes.

Cheers and have a great weekend,

Ian Graham

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This is another instalment in “the power of kindness” series of posts. Contact is an important characteristic of kindness.

“Facility of contact is a basic aspect of kindness. Where you find contact, you find the heart. You find an attitude that makes you feel that this person is right there, just for you. That you are her or his priority at the moment. That you count.”

Wining Friends and Influencing People, by Dale Carnegie also goes into considerable detail on the importance of attention to the person you are connecting with. When you are engaged with another person one of the most important things you can provide is your full attention. This makes the person feel important and listened to.

This is my story on how not to behave when engaged in conversation with someone. I recently attended a networking event regarding the outlook for VC funding in Ottawa. After the event I took the opportunity to introduce myself to one of the speakers. We started to chat and were continually interrupted by other people wanting to talk with this person. I can understand that others wanted to chat with him; however, it was his total disregard for our conversation that really turned me off. Rather than suggest we meet later or politely finish our conversation he kept jumping to the next best conversation then back to ours. I started to walk away and then he became interested again. Even when we were talking this person was continually scanning the room looking for who else was there to talk to and not listening at all to what I was saying. This was both rude and disrespectful. His comment was “I always look around the room when I am talking with people.” Oh, that makes me feel better, you are rude and inconsiderate to everyone not just me. He did provide his card; however, I have no intention of following up.

Contact should be genuine, warm and with respect for all of the stakeholders involved. I think the start-up context is obvious; build a network of contacts on these principles and you will have a strong, vibrant and symbiotic ecosystem.

Cheers and have a great weekend,
Ian Graham

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